Vaguely Evil

I feel vaguely guilty and evil living in our instant-gratification society. That's a topic done ad nauseum, but I feel it nonetheless.
Lately I am blogging to avoid a nervous breakdown and subsequent arrival at the psych ward not of my choice. So far it seems to be working. I popped some Valerian last night, then worried about low blood pressure, as folks with said low blood pressure are not supposed to take it. A recent doctor's visit confirmed I had it, but then again, I've gone to the doctor's and they've told me it's high, so I have no idea, Dear Doctor, what my blood pressure really is! From day to day!
I am now qualified to enter the senior citizen's home of my choice. Hypochondriacs, unite!
Ah, blogging.
My last topic was about Sex in the City. I have more vague fears about people appropriating my genius (tee, to, ho) and copying it onto their servers and pretending they wrote it. That bugs me, it really does. Hence I might actually put my name to my work, but you fuckers will NEVER find me! The Witness Protection Program actually WORKS! I read a book once about that, and the family ended up living in a wee shitty house in Florida, where all evil must go. That and New Jersey and Texas and California, but in CA the evil is, at least, tan.
Hmm...
When I am really bored I go online, as Pisces tend to do, and read shit about astrology and love compatibility. I am apparently compatible with Scorpio and Taurus. Gemini is OK too, but I should avoid those drafty air signs. I find this all very relaxing and enjoyable between popping Valerian and trying not to contemplate life in a psych ward.
Nah, forget putting my name down. I can just see myself applying for a job at the federal govt. (NOT GONNA HAPPEN) and some person shoving this in my face. "Did you write this, hmm? Did you?" Insert evil laugh here. Bahahahahahahaha.
I actually had a wonderful professor in college with a laugh like that. It was a beautiful thing, that laugh. I miss that man, he was something else. You don't meet a lot of true characters in this life, but when you do, it can be pretty darned enjoyable. Pretty darned enjoyable, sonny!
Kerplump.
The TV is still missing from my life b/c of my friends killing the Cable Monster. I am quite sad about this, as I love the Cable Monster. I watched some of the Danny Bonaduce (sp) show and really enjoyed it, oddly enough. The guy is so PISSED. He reminds of me throughout my twenties, although I was far less pissed, and in any case society does not support female aggression. We're just supposed to throw up, starve ourselves, and buy a lot of shoes. Guys can throw punches, but you'd better believe women feel like that sometimes. And I'm sure many women have thrown punches, but I still prefer to err on the side of non-violence, thank you very much.
Anyway, I like Danny. He's got issues galore, he blames everyone but himself, and he's alienating his wife a whole helluva lot, but he's also honest, mostly kind, and interesting as hell. It's just hard to reconcile his angry middle-aged self with that cute kid from The Partridge Family. It's kind of heart-breaking, really.
I read he was physically abused by his Dad. Duh! Danny! I hope you've put two and two together! As someone also abused by their father I can tell ya this, at some point you have to lay the anger down...and rework it. No matter what that takes. You learn to channel the aggression. I still work on it to this day, and don't always succeed, but you can do it, buddy. You're a force of nature and it can work.
So he's a kindred spirit, Danny, in certain ways. I admire him, b/c most people in our society THINK they're sane, but they're in denial. He might seem more insane on some level, but he's very honest, and society doesn't want honest, it wants to sweep everything under the rug.
But that's a whole other ball of yarn. Or wax. Whichever you prefer.